39 Weeks

I'm alive and fine.  Baby is still on the inside.  I just haven't had much to say in the last month.  I think about stuff to write and feel terribly guilty for not posting more often, but it's like I only have little things to say and then it's not worth it and then I go hide.

What's been happening?

-My office had an extremely low-key shower for me with cake and a few gifts.  It was really nice and I appreciated my co-workers accommodating my wishes about not having a huge blowout party.  These gifts happened to be the first baby items that we brought into our house, so that was a big thrill too.

-My sister and my BFF threw a Celebration of Awesome for me in lieu of a shower.  This was a gathering of the women in my family at a local hotel for a high tea and we had a wonderful time.

-I have it on good authority from several people that based on the way that I'm carrying/the baby's heartrate/the date of conception/the angle of Venus that the baby is definitely a boy/girl.  I am confident that the baby is a boy/girl.

-The baby dropped about 2 weeks ago in order to spare me the horrible heartburn (or, cause you know that's how anatomy works) and now I just feel like a 10 lb. (uneducated guesstimate, whatever it's heavy) weight is swinging between my legs when I'm walking.

-In other "Holy Crap, This Might Be Real, But Let's Not Tempt Fate" news, I have set up the Pack 'n' Play in our bedroom and my sister's boyfriend, a fireman, came over to install our car seat for us.  I am now driving around with an infant seat in my car.  I am praying that the fates are appeased by JD and I stubbing our toes on the much-larger-than-it-seemed-in-the-store Pack 'n' Play every time we walk by.  Prior to getting the car seat installed, we took the car to the car wash and they vaccuumed out the inside of the car and then we got to ride through the car wash and it's so beautiful now I don't even want to drive it.  Yes, I'm 5.

-Our house is a mess.  We are hopeless clutterers.  One day the crap will drown me in a tidal wave of junk mail and spare computer cables.  JD does not think my solution of burning down the house is a good idea (probably because he refuses to abandon our clutter-filled ways and/or wants to avoid being labeled an "arsonist."  He's small-minded like that).  Also, the front of the house has a weird smell that I'm pretty sure is not me because wouldn't I then smell the smell wherever I went and I don't so I think it's something in the house.  The smell might be from our houseplant; I don't think it's from stinkbugs cause they have a different smell.  I don't think we're hoarders, but I'm not as diligent as I could be about cleaning up and maintaining and JD won't do anything involving cleaning unless I'm cleaning at the exact same time (sometimes not even then).  I haven't found a solution yet, but I am ever hopeful.

-I love the show "Fringe."  I feel so good knowing that I hung in there through the stupid period because the show would come back to a place of even more awesome and it did.  I don't know why I'm still watching "Grey's" as it entered the stupid period long ago and it looks as if it'll never return.

-Will try to post more soon, even if it's just little things.  I've been following everyone's blogs, just not commenting very often.

Bless the Brown Cows of the Desert That Give Us Hot Chocolate Milk

I had a Venti (read: horse trough) Hot Chocolate with Whipped Cream from Starbucks.


It was the best fucking hot chocolate that ever was.


Amen.
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No ill effects from that part of Un-detox (Retox?) Day #1, but then I ate cheese and it was like the Yokohama Bullet Train.(*)(**) So, I'll be continuing the good decision made a year ago to only partake of cheese in rare circumstances.


For lunch, I had chicken and mashed potatoes and creamed spinach (I heart Boston Market). The mashed potatoes were OK, but the creamed spinach was an explosion of love and joy that I haven't experienced since the last episode of Glee.


I'm planning to refrain from dairy the rest of the day, though, so that I can sort of act like I was un-detoxing with moderation whatever that is.
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*Is there a bullet train to/from Yokohama?


**Please excuse my nastiness. I was born in a barn -- New Jersey.(***)


***Again, please excuse my insulting demeanor. I'm sure New Jersey is fine, really. No, really. They've got Bon Jovi doing their ad campaign, it can't be all bad.(****)


****Does my state even have an ad campaign? I mean, my real state, not the Shmomonwealth of Shmurshminia. I'm going with the absolutely no-evidence-basis, uneducated guess answer of: No - my state doesn't have an ad campaign. We don't need one. People know how awesome we are without Bon Jovi or Arnold. We have our own state cake! We have many malling options. Goldie Hawn is from here. Plus, our most well-known state song is about our lottery.(*****) Deal with it, people. You wish your state was that awesome. "It could be." If you lived here.


*****Five bucks says that Mel and Lindsay are currently humming our song.
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Um, I think the sugar (or the manic chapter of the depressive episode, take your pick) kicked in somewhere around Bon Jovi.

HA!

Everyone I know must read this. NOW. It made me spit out my drink and most of my internal organs with laughter.

Then, come back here and tell me your thoughts on: a) how it absolutely stinks that Glee was not on this week, b) this week's episode of Top Chef, and c) my inability to keep off any of the weight I lose.

Thank You House

***Possible spoilers from House, so if you are planning to see it, come back later.***

Dear This Week's House,

Thank you for helping me to realize that, in order to act normal become sane get better, I must actually take my pills.

Unlike House's roommate, I was not refusing to take my pills this time because they stop me from being me. (Though G-D knows that we've gone down that road so many times they are dedicating a rest stop in my honor. Now with a Bob Evans!) I also was not not taking my pills out of some scheme to turn all the patients in the asylum against their doctors. Instead, I went through one of my periods of just not taking them.
Yes, this is stupid. And reckless, and unhealthy. Yes, this caused me to become a weeping, snivelling, ill-tempered, non-coping mess.

So, I'm back on - because I do want to get better. And with only one dose in me, I feel like I can actually handle life. I took my meds yesterday, I'm taking them today and I plan to take them tomorrow. That's as far as I'm going to go with my planning, because the longer term promises have not been working for me.

The Usual

Nothing really exciting going on around here, so I haven't been posting. Here's what I've been doing the past couple of days.

On Sunday, I went to Mel's reading at a local bookstore and got to see some TOOTPU (The Order of the Plastic Uterus, that is, DC area infertiles) gals there and meet Mel's husband, Josh. It's nice to have a face to go with all the stories of the guy who patiently handles Mel's 11 PM anxieties. :)

Monday and Tuesday, I was at an industry conference on leadership training and strategic decision making. A new season of The Biggest Loser was taping at the same hotel. We were just sitting around eating lunch and seeing people with walkie-talkies pass by every couple seconds, then a big bunch of people wearing the show's t-shirts walked in and we finally got it. I didn't get to see Bob or Jillian, but a couple other people did.

Last night, I went over to BFF's house where she made me a fabulous dinner (including cupcakes!) and coffee in exchange for building her Ikea furniture. Not only am I an attorney, I'm also a semi-professional Ikea construction contractor.

Tonight, TOOTPU is gathering for ice cream to see Murgdan while she's on her DC vacation! So excited!

Lem 'n' Ada

Does anyone else remember the Strawberry Shortcake cartoons? I had a Strawberry Shortcake sleeping bag when I was little and I loved it to death. My friend had some of the dolls and they smelled like cakes and pastries!

Jess from Life in the White House tagged me with the Lemonade Stand Award!

This one is for those who use the lemons in their lives to make lemonade, or who help do the same for others.

Here are the rules for The Lemonade Stand Award:
1. You must link back to the person you received the award from.
2. You have to nominate 10 bloggers who are deserving of this award!

This blog has made the rounds of the IF community, so I'd like to take the chance to nominate some bloggers who inspire me outside of the family-building sphere.

What Was I Thinking?
Ima On (and Off) the Bima
Baking and Books
The Meatless Chulent
Juggling Frogs
The Rebbetzin's Husband
Jew Wishes
Leah in ChicagoAccidentally Jewish
The Simple Cajun Life
Bake at 350

24 - Gotta Love It

The following post discusses last night's episodes of 24, so if you don't want to be spoilered, look away, look away!

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OH MAH GAWSH! What an exciting two hours. They are finally bringing back the suspense.

My only problem with the episodes last night is that the writers seem to be pulling ideas from other books and movies. Not an original thought left, I guess. For example:

• Underwater divers swimming through dark waters to gain secret entrance to a location -- seen in The Rock
• President being locked into underground bunker while terrorists take over the White House and try to break in -- seen in Vince Flynn's excellent novel, Transfer of Power
• Lone agent and important personage (here, Aaron Pierce and Olivia Taylor) hiding from terrorists in the White House -- also seen in Transfer of Power
• President is punched for speaking impudently to terrorists -- seen in Air Force One

These were just an example. Can you come up with any others?

ICLW - Day 7

Hosea wins Top Chef? Man, that was unlikely. Hosea is a very lucky man that the judges only considered the meal in front of them for their decision.* Otherwise, the Fish Chef's mediocre performances would have found him out on his arse.

I had been rooting for Carla, the cheftestant who resembles (to me, at least) a Fraggle. I wasn't rooting for her because of her Fraggle-ness, I feel that she's a gifted chef who delivers when it counts. Plus, she's from DC. Hootie Hoo!

I think Carla's problem, however, was in listening too much to Casey. Why would you discount your own ideas for someone who didn't even win the dang competition? Didn't Richard lose last season on a sous vide dish?

I completely agree with the analysts at Television Without Pity that Stefan was never a villain, though the production "elves" tried to twist the editing to make it seem that way throughout the season. His behavior towards Carla during and after the final challenge proves how caring a person he is.

Anyway, congratulations to Hosea on his win and many good wishes to Carla and Stefan. I hope to hear great things about you in the future.

* A criterion that the show's fans have been screaming about and pestering for since the beginning of the show. Now? Now, they decide to do the right thing? Also, many, many thanks to Tom Colicchio for pointing out to Toby Young that he was being a little twerp for wanting a dessert when the rules specifically stated that the cheftestants didn't have to do a dessert.

Comments Left At:
1. Schroedinger's Zygote
2. Baby OCD
3. I Think I Hear Your Mother Calling
4. The Great Big If
5. Chez Perky

Comment Returned To:
1. Here is to another day

TV Meme

Found this somewhere a long time ago...

Name your top six TV shows of all time, before reading the questions.

1. Friends
2. The West Wing
3. 24
4. Quantum Leap
5. ER
6. Sex and the City

1.) Who is your favorite character from #2 (The West Wing)?
Josh Lyman (Bradley Whitford)

2.) Who is your least favorite character from #4 (Quantum Leap)?
Ziggy the Computer

3.) What would a crossover between #1 (Friends) and #5 (ER) include?
They already did it. See The One with Two Parts, Part 2. Monica and Rachel go on a double date with doctors from the hospital (George Clooney and Noah Wyle) who treated Rachel for a sprained ankle.

If one of the Friends came onto ER, I see Lisa Kudrow (Phoebe) as a pediatric psychiatrist having to counsel an abused child in the ER.

4.) Who is your favorite ship from #6 (SaTC)?
Charlotte and Harry. They seemed more real to me.

5.) If you were to set up one person from #3 (24) and one person from #6 (SaTC) on a blind date, who would they be?
Jack Bauer and Samantha Jones - I think she could loosen him up a little.

6.) If you could meet one person from #4 (Quantum Leap) and spend the day with them, who would it be and what would you do?
I'd go to a bar and throw darts with Al (Dean Stockwell).

7.) If you could change one thing about #2's (The West Wing) plotline, what would you change?
Get rid of the whole ridiculously explained Toby Ziegler (Richard Schiff) revealing state secrets thing.

8.) Explain a relationship between two people (not necessarily romantic) from show #5 (ER) and why you like the relationship between them.
I liked the Mark/Susan relationship where they both liked each other and they just couldn't figure out how to make it happen.

9.) If the lead title characters (first names in the credits) from #1 (Friends) and #3 (24) were both drowning, and you could only save one, who would it be?
Between Kiefer and Courtney Cox Arquette, I'm going with Jack Bauer. Sorry, Monica.

10.) If you could change the title characters' order in the credits for #4 (Quantum Leap), what order would you choose?
I'm fine with the order. There's only two characters.

11.) If you were able to add a new character, any kind of character you wanted, to the storyline of #6 (SaTC), what would the character be like, and what would their role be?
Ryan, the financial advisor who never got romantically involved with Carrie and taught her how to handle her finances.

12.) What happens in your favorite episode of show #2 (The West Wing)?
Can't pick a favorite; I love 'em all.

13.) If you could kill off one of the characters in #1 (Friends), who would it be and how would you do it?
Phoebe would be killed by a "drunk driver" while visiting her brother, Frank Jr. It would turn out that it wasn't a drunk driver, but a hit because she was a super secret spy and being a flighty masseuse was her cover.

14.) If you got the chance to visit the set for either show #3 (24) or show #5 (ER), which would you choose?
24, cause it's the only one I still watch.

15.) If you could date anyone from any of these shows, which show and which person would it be?
When I was younger, I would have said Ross or Chandler, but I need someone who can handle adult life a little bit better. I'll go with Harry (SaTC) because he seems the most like a real person and someone who would treat me right.

Patient Zero

Not that all colds start with me, just that I got the cold first in my house. John Dear swears that he has illness too, but he may just trying to be a part of my world.

Stayed home from work today. JD is taking care of me, making endless cups of tea, dealing with my whining and now making me chicken noodle soup. He's also watching four million episodes of Jon & Kate + 8. Voluntarily. He rocks right now.

It snowed for literally 1 minute this morning, though the sun was shining and the skies were blue. I took some pictures, but don't think they came out. It was weird.

I hope to post new year's wishes (not resolutions) today, but first, I must drink my tea and eat my soup.

May we all have a happy and healthy (soon, please) new year in 2009!!

Vent

The following is just me venting and doing a brain dump, so please take it with a grain of salt.
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BAD THINGS
I hate everyone and everything. Eff all y'all, you g-dd-mn shiny, happy people.

I'm cold, my feet are freezing. I feel like I'm taking the Bar again. It was so cold in that arena, you could see your breath. In July, people!!!

I'm supposed to take this new pill in the morning and in the afternoon, and I'm just not managing it. I'm a total f-ck up. Plus, I'm getting better without it (HA), so I'd like to stop it.

My back hurts, my shoulders hurt, my neck hurts. Depression hurts, I'm not on Cymbalta, so it ain't helping me.

My nails are short and I can't find the time to polish them.

I came up with a great idea for homemade holiday gifts and it's not as easy as I wanted it to be and I think it's going to take a lot longer than I thought to do them all and I'm worried about it. But if it works it will be awesome and it's a good gift and even though I'm spending money to make it, it's still a LOT less than I previously spent and the savings will go to the Debt Snowball. (Not that we're in a bunch of debt, just that I'm going to add it to the next car payment).

I need to take a shower desperately. My hair hurts and itches because it's dirty. I am disgusting.

John Dear returned my audiobook to the library because it was 3 days late and earning fines. I wasn't able to renew it because someone had the book on hold. Except I was on disc 32 of 36 discs. I don't know when I'll be able to get the book back and I was loving it. Darn it.

JD started work yesterday (yay!) and I'm concerned that there will be a reversion back to me doing everything. I expressed that concern yesterday and he said that he will do his best to continue the partnership we've had going the last couple of months. I'm waiting. I'm not even guardedly or cautiously optimistic -- I'm just waiting.

I don't know why bad things happen to good people, why the caged bird sings or why birds suddenly appear every time you are near.

GOOD THINGS
I am now addicted (again) to Jon and Kate + 8. I love the current commercial that TLC is running with the Jon and Kate smiling at each other in the field. I am a tremendous dork.

Top Chef has started again. Yay! I will be watching the premiere tonight over TiVo.

JD and I exercised last night for 40 minutes. We rocked it hard-core.

I had a three-bean salad with couscous (on the nutritionist's plan) for lunch yesterday and it was legen - wait for it - dary!!! I must figure out how to duplicate this salad (from Jason's Deli). I know that it has: kidney beans, edamame, garbanzo beans, minced red onion, diced red and yellow bell pepper and cilantro. Don't know what the dressing is. If you know, please tell me! I could eat this every day.

We're having a surprise birthday party for my dad (he's turning 65) and making a video documentary about him and he has no idea!! I'm so excited!

BOTH GOOD AND BAD
I've got the Sanford & Son theme song in my head and can't get it out. It's catchy.

I Am a TV Show

So, to my total and utter discredit, I watch Grey's Anatomy. Didn't even start watching till Season 3. Yes, I am a teenager.

On orders of my Fairy Godmother, I'm not allowed to watch the show by myself. Someone has to watch it with me because I tend to break down emotionally while watching. Usually, John Dear just sits next to me and plays on the laptop while I watch.

Here's where I have completely become a TV show. If you are not a loser like me and missed last night's episode, there was a patient who had experienced chronic headaches for years and years. His pain level was always at an 8 out of 10. He mentioned to one of the doctors that in the middle of all this pain he was feeling, his wife died. She had stood by him, took care of him, carted him to doctors and hospitals and then just died. He couldn't even feel the pain of his wife dying because he was in so much pain already.

I worry that this will happen to me and John Dear. That he will never stop being in pain. That I'll spend my whole life as a caregiver rather than a partner and die, before my time, worn out from a spouse who cannot/will not pull his own weight or any weight at all.

I'm not really sure what to do with that feeling. I wonder if we could get him on disability or something. He's not working, the job prospects don't look great. I mean at least if he did a majority of the housework instead of playing video games 90% of the day, I'd feel better. I've been trying to encourage him to maybe go back to school. At least he'd be doing something.

It's like living alone, only worse. If I was alone, when I left a room clean, I'd come back to it clean. Now, it doesn't matter, there's always a worse mess. I have to deal with all his crap too.

I'm sorry for this mopiness. I'm just too depressed to comment or post regularly. I am reading everyone's blogs though, so know that I am there.

Jon Stewart - AWESOMENESS

I am so in love with Jon Stewart and The Daily Show's ability to skewer all politicians who are being hypocritical. This clip, which ran on Wednesday, is fantastic.

Arrivederci Sophia

I'm sad to report that the beloved Estelle Getty, Sophia Petrillo of Golden Girls, has passed away, just shy of her 85th birthday. Sophia and Dorothy (Bea Arthur) were always my favorite characters in that show. They both reminded me of my own relatives -- maybe because Italian-Americans and American Jews have a lot in common.

So, there goes our collective hope for a Golden Girls reunion, tentatively titled, Golden Girls Again: This Time With Extra Gold.

Blecch

The flowers have died, there is no morning dew. The crickets aren't chirping and I am so blue.
--Sung by Sandra Huxtable during on the times she had broken up with Elvin on The Cosby Show

Was feeling kind of down when I started this post. Therefore, the only appropriate music was "Anna" by Gunnar Madsen (played at the end of a Sex & the City episode, "La Douleur Exquise", where Carrie breaks up with Big and he goes to Paris). Sad and tears inducing, but good for being sad and emotional. Very French. Probably plays in those cafés that Alexa writes about where French infants lounge in leather jackets, smoking Gauloises and arguing about Sartre.

Was sad after reflecting on Kymberli's post regarding Clockwatchers & Calendarlookers, being ignored by several bosses in my quest to answer their questions and a general malaise.

After a funny conversation with a co-worker and listening to KT Tunstall's "Suddenly I See", bringing up simultaneous images of the start of The Devil Wears Prada and an opening scene of a Grey's Anatomy episode, I'm feeling happier.

Don't mind me, just the mercurial temperament in me. I think I'm less like Mercury though than I am like Janus. Mercury changed feelings in an instant. I feel like I hold all feelings in me at the same time. I am happy and sad all at once, looking forward and back just like Janus.

Now I'm pissed because my boss is an utter ass who likes to waste my time. AAAAHHH!

Absolute Happiness

Do you remember the times in your life when you felt absolute happiness? You know, the time where you were so filled with joy that it felt that your heart would burst?

I feel this way whenever I'm lost in a good book. I also get this feeling when I'm laughing with BFF. I had it on the day that John Dear and I got engaged. (I probably would've had it on our wedding day, but I was sick and hopped up on Dramamine most of the day).

I feel it in less momentous occasions. This week's season finale of Grey's Anatomy. Right at the end, where Meredith and Derek got together. Bliss. Nirvana. The first year's season finale of Friday Night Lights when the team wins the state championship. My heart exploded in joy.

This weekend at the beach has been so peaceful. I've finished two books in two days and will hopefully finish another today. John Dear and I both had massages yesterday. We'll probably go to the outlets and maybe see a movie today. I'm at peace and I'm happy.

TiVo Help Needed

To all those who have TiVo, I need some technical support.

I have digital cable through a box. Channels 1-100 are basic, and 100-up are special basic and premium. We get basic, special basic and HBO.

When I hooked up my TiVo, all the channels changed. NBC (channel 4 here) was now at 34; Fox (on 5) was at 35. Basically, NBC, Fox, CBS and ABC switched their places with home shopping channels. Everything else stayed the same.

EXCEPT...

I can't get TiVo to go to any channel higher than 100. I miss my HBO, I miss my movie channels, I miss my Discovery Home channel! Waa!

When I turn TiVo off and switch tuners, the cable box allows me to access all these channels at their (previously) regular numbers. Any ideas?
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This was a post for the Backwards Edition of Works for Me Wednesday. For more Works For Me Wednesday, see Rocks in my Dryer every Wednesday!

The Hall of Whining

What follows is a list of things I currently want to whine about. Take it with a grain (or an entire shaker) of salt.

• My throat hurts.
• Someone is burning a gingerbread candle that used to smell good, but now makes the whole office smell like old and used-up car deodorizer.
• Everyone on the IF blogs is pregnant or has children. Oh, except for me, that is. How does that work exactly? (It's not that I don't enjoy and love reading these women's (and some men's) blogs, and I am truly overjoyed that those announcing pregnancies are getting their wishes, but jeez).
• John Dear is a bum*. He says that he loves me, but really he just wants a nurse/mother/servant. Those last statements were really not contradicted by him in counselling yesterday. This confirms his bum-osity.
• JD had a "fall" in physical therapy today and so, did not go into work. Because he is an irresponsible bum, he does not have contact information for any co-workers and so could not tell anyone that he would not be showing up at work today. As I expressed in counselling yesterday, I am worried that he will be fired. Yet AGAIN.
• Did OPK, which turned up negative. Basically expected. But really, what's the point? It's not like JD is likely to "complete the transaction" anyways.
• I have too many things to do!!!
• TiVo won't let me watch any of the premium channels we pay for. I need to call them up and fix this, but don't have time. (Oh, if you've gotten this far and know anything about TiVo and have hints, please let me know.)
• Whaa, waaa, waa. Nyah. Bleaaa.

*By "bum" I do not mean the common definition of a homeless idler, but instead refer to the biggest insult among my brother, sister and I when we were little. As in, "Jendeis is reading MY magazine! She's a bum!"

24 - Day 7 Preview

The preview for the newest season (Day 7) of 24 ran during the seventh inning of the World Series game. It is a must-see. Check out who we're fighting this year!

Both JD's family and mine have become 24 fanatics, but my brother and I have been watching right from the beginning. Here's hoping that this season will be better than last year's. One of the problems with the later seasons of 24 is that they really moved away from verisimilitude. In Day 1, I think the writers tried to have a realistic sense of what could happen in only one day. By Day 6 (hell, by Day 2), not so much. Let's see Jack eat or walk into a bathroom in Day 7!!

Also, I'm interested to see how they screw up locations and traffic times in the DC area, since the show will be set in the good ol' District of Columbia. Our traffic is better than LA's, but not by much.

Many thanks to Margalit for posting the link to the preview up on her blog.

Elvis as POTUS

Elvis Presley was always tops with my parents. They got to see him in Vegas when he started performing there (when he was right at the edge of the precipice). For me, I've always enjoyed most of Elvis' songs, but I seem to like them more and more as I get older. For example, I never was into "Can't Help Falling In Love With You," but I've grown to like it and it became our first dance song at our wedding.

Anyways, I've been reading a Television Without Pity commentary on an Elvis documentary and needed to share the following:

Steven Boone: If Elvis had gone the evangelical route, he'd probably still
be here, and we'd prolly have three wars alongside Iraq and Afghanistan.

Sars: President Presley.

MZS: Oh, man, I SEE it.

Sars: Thirty years dead he's still better than the current occupant.

MZS: Elvis would have declared, like, one war per month. But on the plus
side: he would have kicked ass performing at his own inaugural.

RIP

Elvis Aaron Presley

1935-1977