Sunday, August 31, 2008

Downtrodden

"HELP! I'm being oppressed!" That's one of my favorite lines from Monty Python (also, one of the only ones I know).

Went back to Weight Watchers today - the first time since getting back from vacation. I gained 3 pounds. It stinks. Yes, I was on vacation for a week. Yes, AF was visiting. It still stinks, though. Pouring organic sea salt into the wound was another celebration of a woman making lifetime member by losing a whopping 21 pounds. Twenty-one freaking pounds, people!

What was the ticket for her? Exercise and not eating crap. Thanks, ma'am. Yeah, she's one of those people who have a problem with the food that they are eating, not with eating in general. She is not an IT-getter.

One of the reasons that I generally love the WW meeting I attend is that the leader and the assistants are all IT-getters. They've all lost lots of weight (out of the 5, I think the smallest amount lost was 75 lbs) and been able to maintain that loss for years. The leader lost 115 lbs! She's awesome. I very much admire her.

Anyways, I was just so down the whole meeting and then when I came home I just broke down, sobbing, all the pain deep in my soul coming in these body-wracking gasps and moans. John Dear tried to be helpful and comforting - he really is a dear. He even made The Boy come sit with me and give me doggy kisses.

This 40 pounds might as well be 40,000. It just seems like it will never come off, we'll never be able to do treatments and we'll never have a baby. It all just stinks right now.

"Everything is horrible. I'm really depressed. I'm really downtrodden. I'm downtrodden squared. Boo hoo. Boo hoo. Boo hoo. The whole world is doomed. Yeah, we're all gonna die!" -- Denis Leary

I'm just trying to pick myself up and get back to the basics of the program. My fitness goal this week is to exercise every day from Sunday - Thursday. My food goal is to record everything I'm eating this week. Hopefully, it will make a difference.

9 comments:

Suzanna Catherine said...

Good Luck with your WW goals this week. I've been a WW since 1994. Got my Lifetime Membership by losing 102# (in 53 weeks). Wish I could say I've kept it all off, but I have not. I'm a comfort food junkie. What can I say? I think I've lost the same 75# about four times!! Right now I need to drop about 40#, too. Weight loss is one of life's biggest challenges for me.

And being a WW, I *KNOW* what I need to do! I need to write down every mouthful I eat, watch my portion sizes (a real problem for me!), drink my water, do my walking. It's just so freakin' hard to do all that stuff ALL the time. I also know how discouraging it is to see these little Twiggy's come in with 7# to lose for their *goal* -- give me a break!

I hope you have a good week on program and that you have a *great* weigh in at your next meeting!

Take care. There are some of us out here who understand. :-)

VA Blondie said...

I am sorry that you are feeling bad. I do WW online only, and my weight goes up and down. I am learning what I need to do to lose weight, but it is difficult. Keep with it. I am right there with you. I also have another 40 pounds to go to reach goal.

Meghan said...

Sorry you had a rough day. I have no doubt you'll make your goal, we all hit little speedbumps along the way to things, that's all this will be!

And even more sorry about AF making an appearance on your vacay...that bitch!

Sue said...

I don't think weight loss is easy for anyone, even those who manage to succeed. It's also a series of ups and downs as you struggle to make major changes in your life. Don't be so hard on yourself!

Jen said...

You are bound to have times of ups and downs. Frankly, I think only three pounds with vacation and AF is great. You have been doing a great job and you will get there.

Antigone said...

I know you don't want a$$vice, but food diaries helped me a lot in the past. And 3 pounds isn't that bad a gain with a vacation and your period to contend with.

Take care. I wish I could do *something*.

Jill said...

I feel for you, I really do! It's such a hard place to be in. Good luck! I know you can do it!

theclam said...

Oh Jen, sorry you are feeling "downtrodden"... It does seem undoable but you know what? You CAN do it! And to only gain 3 pounds while on holiday and with AF is good...

Drink lots of water, get back to healthy eating and exercise and you'll see - it will start coming off again!

HUGS!!!!

Io said...

Aw boo. Try not to feel bad - you'll take it back off and much more. You can do it, I know you can.