Remember how I was totally going to be back on board with this whole posting thing? Yeah, that happened.
I'm here for right now, and rather than set myself up for failure, I'm just going to say that I'm posting right now, and if I happen to post again, cool.
Here's the news:
A.) I stopped going to Weight Watchers meetings and started to lose weight, thus proving that just paying for their program but not actually attending their meetings still has some beneficial affect on your health. (Or it could be that I'm continuing to incorporate more exercise, better fats and a wider variety of fruits and vegetables into my daily life, but I prefer my first analysis).
B.) We started back on the TTC bandwagon for #2. Did back-to-back dIUIs over Memorial Day Weekend (yeah, we got to the beach Friday night and had to leave Saturday afternoon in order to be back home in time for Sunday's procedure). BFN.
C.) We decided to skip the next cycle so that we could have an actual vacation over July 4th. It turns out that didn't really matter as I had my shortest cycle on record, and got AF while we were on vacation.
D.) Did our 2nd round at the end of July. Found out this past Thursday - BFP. (I know, way to bury the lead, huh?) First beta: 121. For comparison purposes, LM's first beta was 57.1. My repeat beta (yesterday, 96 hours between) was 573. We're due for a third beta tomorrow and based on that, they'll decide when they want to do an ultrasound.
E.) Yes, I'm feeling sick and dizzy. Based on my pregnancy with LM, I've got 2 weeks before all hell breaks loose. As I told Mel, it's a good thing I was able to retain my amateur status for the Olympics, because I'd like to medal in something, even if it's just nausea.
Tuesday, August 14, 2012
The Dog Ate My Posts and Other Excuses
Thursday, January 21, 2010
Quo Vadis
Yesterday, JD and I met with the RE for our Quo Vadis meeting, aka "What's Next, Doc?" My feelings on are all over the place. I feel sad that we're even in this position (i.e., infertility in general and, specifically, about to embark on dIUI #6). I feel angry that it's taking so long. I feel positive that my doc is responding to us and our concerns. I feel frustrated with my inability to stay away from gluten. I feel embarassed that I have such a struggle with taking my meds. I feel happy that I have rocked my Wii Fit Plus every day since we set it up (see my other blog for more details).
I told the doc that, given our record (5 dIUIs (3 with Prometrium), 1 miscarriage, 0 take home babies) my hope level for this upcoming IUI is pretty low. My unfulfilled due date is coming up in mid-February and I'm feeling increasingly anxious about it. I'm ready to move to the next level.
From a completely biased position, it seems like my doc would like me to do unmedicated dIUIs from here to kingdom come. (Those were probably not his exact words). Really, he thinks that we should keep doing what we're doing for a little while more, but he was aware that we were not going to want to hear that. My response was to semi-joke, "No, I want to hear what you would do, then I want to ignore that and do what I want to do."
His proposal was to do two more unmedicated cycles after #6 and then add meds, probably Clomid. The idea of the meds would be to get my body to release more than one egg at ovulation, providing more targets for the sperm, thus increasing the odds of getting at least one baby out of this. Of course, increasing the number of eggs also increases the chance of multiples, which JD wanted to discuss back, forth and sideways, but my feeling is that we should wait to cross that bridge if and when we get to it.
My compromise was to do #6 and #7 unmedicated, then maybe go for medicated cycles or another unmedicated round, depending on my thoughts then.
I'll start the OPKs tomorrow for Cycle #6. Our power song for this cycle: "You're Gonna Go Far Kid" by The Offspring (off my CAPS playlist). Our inspirational song for this cycle: "Defying Gravity" from Wicked, as adapted by Glee.
Thursday, August 6, 2009
Stockpile
Amidst the negative things going on in our world (JD got a ticket yesterday for driving the wrong way down a one-way street (he was mixed up from a detour and got lost), and today he hit a car while he was backing up out of a parking space (everyone is fine, just cosmetic damage to the other guy's car)), some good things are actually going on.
I've been concerned about the number of vials of donor s.pe.rm that we have stored up. This concern has only increased with the miscarriage. DS is a commodity and our donor is a very, very hot commodity. Since we do back-to-back IUIs, we'll use 2 vials in every cycle, successful or not. When you would like more than 1 kid and don't know how many cycles it will take to get those kids, you want to store as many vials as you possibly can.
Today, we got a call from the bank that they were offering 5 (!) vials of our preferred type (they come in 3 types: ICI, IUI and IVF; our clinic prefers ICI, i.e., unwashed samples). That's the most they've ever offered us and I'm so excited! Luckily and gratefully, we were able to buy them all.*
We now have 10 vials in our stockpile and I feel like this is a good number to have. That with 10 vials, I can relax and trust that JD and I will be able to have the family that we've dreamed of for so long.
*Our bank offers a buyback provision of 50% back for vials that haven't left their storage facility. So, if we ultimately decide not to use some of the vials, we won't be out for all the money we paid.
Monday, May 25, 2009
Hurry Up and Wait
DIUI - Part II went as smoothly as Part I. I was in a different exam room this time (kitted out with a lovely new mobile, much thanks to Chez Perky), but otherwise, everything else was the same.
I did find out the counts for both samples. Our clinic prefers that frozen samples have a post-wash count of at least 3 M. Here's our counts:
Round II - 17 M
The doctors and nurses in both rounds (since we had weekend procedures, we didn't get our regular nurse and RE) were impressed with the counts and hopeful that this cycle would be the only one we needed. Round I had 40% motility. I didn't see the motility number for Round II, but am hoping that it was similar.
Now that we've gone through all the stress and rushing around to get everything ready for this weekend, now we just have to wait. Beta scheduled for June 8th.
Given the fact that my symptoms for ovulation and PMS are the same as early pregnancy symptoms, I'm going to try not to do any self-diagnosing. I'd also like to not drive myself crazy with the tests. We'll see how that goes.
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Sunday, May 24, 2009
Sleepless
So, everything went well for dIUI - part I. I wore all my lucky jewelry (earrings from JD for our 1st anniversary, necklace from parents, bracelet from LorzaRN, fuzzy socks from KateDaphne). JD held my hand and put his other hand on my forehead; he was so supportive.
The procedure was really quick. Walk in, make sure all the numbers match, sign the form, lie back, you're done. They had me stay laying down for 5 minutes. Afterwards, we walked across the hall to my acupuncture appointment and I just tried to relax and visualize my body as a peaceful and comforting location, one where sperm could meet egg and settle down a while.
I had some cramping for most of the day. Nothing painful, just uncomfortable. I pretty much just rested all day while JD took care of me.
We both had trouble sleeping last night. I was able to sleep for a few hours but once I woke up, couldn't get back to sleep. When I gave it up as a bad job, JD went in to sleep for a few hours. I'll go out soon, taking The Boy for his walk and getting us some breakfast.
The second IUI is later this morning. I'm glad that I have Monday off since, if I go by yesterday, I won't be getting any tasks other than reading done today.
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Doubling up on comments, since I was unable to leave comments yesterday --
Friday, May 22, 2009
Ongoing (also, ICLW May Day 2)
Time to tell you interwebs of all the BIG MAJOR THINGS going on at Chez Jendeis.
1. Donor #1 is available!! We got the call last Thursday that they were releasing two types of vials (ICI - unwashed and our clinic's preferred; IUI - washed and acceptable) for our donor. I told John Dear that if my Caps had to lose Game 7 (last Wednesday) in order for Donor #1 to be available, that I was OK with that outcome.
2. Since time is/was a factor and the vials HAD to be ordered on Friday (in order for them to get to our clinic within the allotted time frame), John Dear and I woke up at sparrow's fart on Friday (thanks to Sam for this fabulous description) to get the ID Consent Form signed, notarized and hand-delivered to the bank.
3. Since I'm the patient, JD was not allowed to order the vials. That means that I had to call on my cell phone from my sister's doctoral graduation. Yeah, I ordered 5 vials of sperm (2 to clinic; 3 for storage) while standing on a DC street with a couple hundred people crowded around trying to get into an air-conditioned auditorium. Thank G-D the people at my bank are so professional - they know how to talk to you so that you don't say anything you wouldn't want others to hear.
4. Yay for Elle! She's now Dr. Elle! My sistah the doctah! Unfortunately, they didn't give her a wicked cool blue phone box, just a doctoral hood and a diploma.
5. I've been doing the Is-the-test-line-darker-than-the-control-line? squint for the past 5 days to see whether or not I've ovulated. Got the dark line today and just called my nurse. I don't think I sounded crazier than I usually do. I'm pretty sure all my calls to her are at the same level of "Dayum, that girl be kuh-rrrrrr-aaaaa-zeee!"
6. I've been having a healthy breakfast every day the last two weeks. This good-for-me meal usually consists of tea with milk and less-than-a-teaspoon of sugar (down from one heaping teaspoon) and Greek yogurt with fruit and nuts.
7. Was planning on going to the farmer's market tomorrow to try and pick up some good milk and yogurt from happy cows. I'd also like to get some berries, some asparagus and some more of the delicious spring onions I got last time.
8. Not sure if I'll be able to make it to the farmer's market though -- it depends on when my nurse schedules the IUIs. We're doing two - should be one Saturday and one Sunday. No trip to the beach for moi this Memorial Day Weekend, but hopefully, there will be a better payoff.
And now, for something completely different.
Monday, May 4, 2009
Aaargh
So, it turns out that our guy doesn't have any samples available; all are in quarantine. The bank isn't allowed to give us an approximation of when they will come out of quarantine. We're now on a wait list for both IUI and ICI samples, whatever comes in first is what we would go with.
So, we just picked a backup donor, someone who has all samples available. He doesn't look like JD the way that #1 did, but we're willing to go with him.
So, the plan now is to wait until we need to order the vials (about 10 days or so) and then see who's available. If we can go with #1, great. If not (and that seems more than likely), we'll go forward with #2 for this cycle.
Can't anything be simple? Sheesh.
P.S. Also, my nurse is on medical leave (hope she just has a cold and is not really sick) and will not be returning any calls, which means that JD can't talk to her and ask (as suggested by my mother) whether our doctor could get the quarantine-exit date from the bank. (I'm thinking no, cause it's a donor-privacy thing, but my mother said, don't be ruled by assumptions, leave no stone unturned).
Freaking Out
Head is spinning, heart is racing. Coffee this morning was soooo not a good idea. Today is CD 2, meaning we are officially ON.
JD is calling the bank today to get some questions answered about logistics. For example, when should we order the vials to get them there on time, do we have to US Mail or can we Fedex the consent forms, and can we get put on the waiting list for ICI samples.
Today, our guy came up as a "Call for availability" for IUI samples (still listed as a no for ICI samples) and his Donor category (whether he's ID Consent or not) is blanked out. Oh G-D, oh G-D, oh G-D. Dang, dang, dang.
Being ever the helpful partner that he is and seeking to calm me (NOT!), JD asked what we should do, if our guy has died and that's why his category is blanked out. WHAT?!?!? I, being the gracious person that I am, did not hang up on him.
Not particularly liking my body now as based on estimation, the inseminations will be on Memorial Day weekend, which means no beach trip for me. Man, that stinks!
Friday, May 1, 2009
Vent On and Off
Oh, I'm so ready for my tea today. This Friday has been dragging on and on.
Nothing really going on here. Lemme just vent for a second: John Dear doesn't open mail. Any mail at all. Because his mother never let any of them open the mail, so now he just brings it in (if he even bothers to do that) and dumps it somewhere or everywhere. Come the f-ck on! WTF do you do all day? You can't even open the g. fricken. d. mail!? Why do I have to do everything?
Vent over. I found a big envelope from the Giant Fertility Clinic, which was mailed before our nurse got the news that we were going forward with donor sperm as opposed to IVF. It had a whole lotta stuff that we needed to get done before we cycled; luckily, most of the stuff only applies to IVF and I don't need to worry about it. The things that we do need are: to get consents signed (no problem), GYN checkup (done and faxed over already) and renew blood tests. So, tomorrow morning, instead of going to my first ever farmer's market, I've got to spend a couple hours with the unwashed-and-presumably-incubating-swine-flu masses at our local lab. At least I have a large amount of books from the library to go through while I sit waiting for the vampires.
After I get back from the Faux-Cullens' (the lab for you non-Twilight-ers out there), we'll probably be going directly to the CAPS game - Game 1 of the second round of the playoffs. Let's hope we play better overall in this round against the ever-annoying Penguins.
I think we're going out for dinner on Saturday night with a friend of JD's and his fiancee (I think I spoke about them once before as Hogan and The Cake Taker). Hogan can be a lot of fun; The Cake Taker is tolerable, when I practice patience.
Vent on again. On Sunday, it's one of JD's nephews' birthdays. SIL thought up a great idea for the activity and that was to draft all these 5-year olds into manual labor. Don't want to specify as to what, but suffice it to say that what they will be painting doesn't require great technique and allows the kids to get as dirty as they want to be. MIL told me to wear ratty clothes. Um, hi, I am not 5 and, as such, will not be participating in the activity. No need to lay out the dress code for me, but thanks.
In the same conversation that she told me about the dress code, MIL also told me that she thought up a great gift that I should get SIL for Mother's Day. (Screeching tires). What, what, what?!! I won't be getting anything for SIL for Mother's Day because, as I'm sure you're aware, she is not MY mother and I'm not about to celebrate her simply for the fact that she does have kids. Hopefully, I get through Sunday without killing any of my in-laws. Vent off again.
Thursday, April 23, 2009
How to Choose a Donor
Here for IComLeavWe? Want to learn some background? Please check out my About Me tab at the top or see my Intro post.
I've received questions and interest from several people regarding how John Dear and I went about choosing our sperm donor, so I thought I'd go through some explanations and provide some tips.
Though I had visions of having to sit squeezed with JD into a tiny, dreary medical office, flipping through binders of donor characteristics, all the while hearing snippets of porno music from the room next door, choosing a donor is NOTHING like that. Or at least, it wasn't for us.
In fact, the largest sperm banks in the US have online search engines with all of their available donors characteristics catalogued for free. You can get more information about donors, even purchase vials of sperm, online.
DEVELOPING CRITERIA
Once you have decided to go forward using an unknown sperm donor (from a bank as opposed to from someone you know), start thinking about and discussing your Must Haves, Must Not Haves and Would Likes.
• Physical Characteristics
For us, I wanted to choose a donor who looked similar to JD, because I wanted our baby to look like s/he could have been our genetic child.
Some sperm banks will do photo-matching for a fee, determining which donor (in the whole bank or from a chosen group) most closely resembles your partner or your chosen characteristics.
I also wanted the donor to have some height on him, because my family is pretty tall (at 5'6", I'm the shortest) and because, at almost 5'8", JD always wished that he was taller.
• Blood Type
I wanted the donor to be my blood type or JD's blood type so that at least one of us would be able to give the kid blood if they (G-D forbid) ever needed it.
Additionally, since JD and I are both Rh+, I wanted to find a donor who was also positive, thereby avoiding any possible complications or the need for Rhogam shots.
• Ethnicity
JD was adamant that the donor be of Jewish ethnicity. I didn't care about this aspect as our child will be Jewish because their mother (me) is Jewish and because they will be raised as Jews. The donor's ethnicity, however, was one of the only things that JD felt really strongly about, and it did not dramatically lower our number of donors from which to choose, so I went along with it.
I imagine that if you are looking for something really specific, it might be hard to field a larger sample or you might be left with only one donor who has other characteristics that you don't want.
• Other Characteristics
My mother said that we should find a donor who played tennis. Um, yeah, Mom, that's our first priority. Of course, after we went through all our own criteria and chose the donor that worked for us, the donor that we picked wound up being a tennis player. Maybe this means I should listen to my mother more often. :)
MEDICAL HISTORY
This is one of the big ones, and because we were choosing to use donor sperm due to genetic considerations, JD and I spent most of our time discussing this category.
A lot of the medical history part can be "Duh, we don't want that," but when you get down to the nitty-gritty details, you need to think about and discuss what you might be willing to accept in a donor's medical history. For example, we were willing to accept someone with a history of late adult-onset diabetes. So, if the donor's grandmother was diagnosed with diabetes in her 70s, we were fine with that.
You will need, however, to consider more than just the common "old age" diseases. What about glasses or contacts? Are you OK with someone who is allergic to pollen or dust or penicillin?
JD and I had discussions about these somewhat picayune details as I was narrowing down the list. I think that it would have served as more of a hindrance to me if I had to consider these issues while making my initial cuts.
ID CONSENT & PREGNANCY TRACKING
Many sperm banks now have programs that allow children conceived with the help of donor sperm to find out their donor's name and contact information once the child has turned 18. Each bank's program is different, so make sure to check with your bank if this is something that you want.
JD and I decided that we would like to have an ID Consent donor, but that it wasn't imperative. Following the advice of a fellow blogger, JD and I decided that once our child was born, we'd purchase the available information for their donor (photos, medical histories, etc.) so that the child could have the information when they were younger if they so chose.
Reputable sperm banks strictly track the amount of children born from a donor (both on a total basis and on a geographical basis), so please follow your bank's instructions for registering your child's birth.
Some banks set up donor sibling registries so that children of the same donor (and their parents) can meet and/or stay in contact. Please inquire about this program with your chosen bank.
DONOR ESSAYS & STAFF IMPRESSIONS
Many banks offer donor's responses to essay questions, as well as impressions of the staff on each donor. I liked these offerings initially, but didn't really use them as a selection tool.
I do think that the essays and staff impressions helped both JD and I get comfortable with the idea of using donor sperm in general. These help you to see that the donors are actual people with lives, i.e., the donors are more than just their assembled genetics.
To be blunt, I felt better when I read the essay responses and staff impressions because I didn't want our donor to be a douchebag. I wanted him to be someone that we both would/could have been friends with, if we met in real life.
NARROWING THE LIST
So, you've got your list of things to look for. Put that into the search engine and let 'her rip. The search engine will come back with a list of donors that match or somewhat match the characteristics that you've plugged in. You'll be able to narrow these results down to a list of favorites.
Many banks allow you to bookmark or create a list of favorite donors from your search. Others allow you to save your search characteristics so you don't need to enter the same info in every time you look.
Once I had narrowed down our selection to about 10 possible donors, I then made a spreadsheet so that I could look at all of the donors' characteristics side-by-side. Our bank only allowed you to compare physical characteristics in that way, but I wanted to be able to compare medical histories as well.
JD and I sat down with cups of tea (our version of wine) and went through the donors one by one. Once we'd narrowed down the list several more times, we came up with our donor.
That's it! If you have any questions or if you'd like me to explain something further, just ask me in the comments or shoot me an email.
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Donor Sample Question
Hope that everyone is enjoying IComLeavWe for April. I have a question regarding our protocol, all opinions (regardless of experience) welcome. Cause that's how I roll -- baby making by poll/opinion survey.
Here's the situation. The sperm bank has two different formats (that we are currently looking at) for their samples. These are: ICI (intra-cervical insemination) samples which come unwashed, and IUI (intra-uterine insemination) samples which come pre-washed.
Our fertility clinic does a wash on all samples before insemination, so they recommend that we use ICI samples, since you can lose a lot of viable sperm if the IUI sample is washed again.
The donor that we've chosen (yay!) only has IUI samples available right now, though we can get on a wait list for ICI samples which would become available soon (anywhere from 1 month to 6 months, I don't know cause I haven't called the bank, cause I'd rather freak out and talk to y'all here first).
So, how should we proceed? Go ahead with the IUI samples so that we can start sooner, knowing that we may decrease our chances for a BFP because we lose sperm in the wash, OR wait for ICI samples to become available, making our wait longer?
Note: If we go ahead with the IUI samples for this round, I'd have the bank put us on the wait list for ICI samples so that we could get them for possible future rounds.
