Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Thanks A**hats for Proving My Point

Way to go fat-hating anonymous commenters!  Many thanks for proving my point on my last post.

I welcome all constructive comments, from those that point out that my health might be improved by weight loss to those that disagree with my political stances.  When it comes to needlessly mean and unconstructive comments, however, I draw the line.  At the very least, if you're going to insult me, have the stugatz (i.e., the balls) enough to sign your name.  Don't just hide your m.u.d. (made-up drama) behind an "anonymous" shield.

From now on, this blog will not allow anonymous comments.  Want to comment?  Sign in with any account that Blogger allows (e.g., Blogger, Google ID, Open ID, Wordpress, etc.).

39 comments:

Bionic Baby Mama said...

those people are total maroons. carry on.

Kymberli said...

Ouch. Who died and made "anonymous" from the last post the supreme judgment giver? Chalk another one up for the azhats.

I can't believe that you're so far along already. WOW.

Liddy said...

Just re-read that post.

Who died and made that commentator ruler supreme? I mean do people think that blogs aren't read by a lot of real people. Or written by a real person (who is awesome and nice, and would never say a bad thing about ANY ONE)

Hope you are doing well. Thinking about you.

sarah said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
MFA Mama said...

Y'know, last I checked, skinny women's hipbones and fat women's hipbones were in the same place. Did that u/s tech perhaps need to brush up on her human anatomy? And how dare they suggest that you remove a pump delivering much-needed medication when they could put the probe anywhere else on your body or even do a trans-vag u/s if they absolutely had to? Assholes. I gained seventy pounds with my first pregnancy, and my body seemed to want to hit that same end-weight with each following pregnancy. Each time my OB/GYN dutifully warned me of the risks of GD, large babies, etc. but conceded that this seemed to just be what my body wanted to do. I never did get GD and my largest baby was 7lbs 1 oz. No c-sections. So phooey on the anonymous asshats of the world; the rest of us use our usernames anyway :)

Amanda said...

Where did that technician get certified? K-mart? Come on! And who the hell made that doc God? People of all weights have healthy babies all the time.

As for the anons...maybe they should save their judgment for the crack-whores that are popping out litters. Don't harp on people about their weight. Ugh!

Quiet Dreams said...

assholios

raisingmiles said...

Dumbasses!

Aurora said...

As a family care physician I am worried that you are not looking at the big picture. Granted, some of these comments are rude and hurtful. However, being over 300lbs is extremely unhealthy for you and the baby. Sometimes the truth hurts but it is better to do something constructive while you still can. It seems you enjoy insulting people more than handling responsibility. Being a mother and a professional is no easy feat, but you need to grow-up and take care of your body. Being a thinner and healthy mom may encourage your husband to be more attracted to you hence helping your marriage. It is hard work, but worth it!!

SassyCupcakes said...

Aurora, you need to back off. You are wrong. Being over 300lbs is not extremely unhealthy for her and the baby, miseducated and plain stupid medical caregivers are.

If you are truly a family care physician then you seriously need to go and do some more training especially around pregnancy and obesity because you are wrong and where you get off leaving such a repulsive comment on someone's blog is beyond me.

Jendeis is a great woman who is doing the best she can to look after herself and her baby. Being thinner will not help her in anyway, including with her husband. More so, losing weight at this point in her pregnancy could become very dangerous for her and her baby. That you suggest this as some kind of magic fix all is scary. I really hope you never offer this kind of advice to anyone ever again.

Aurora said...

Dear Sassy Cupcakes,

I do not know if this is the forum for my resume but, I have attended Columbia Medical School and have been a practicing physician for over 12 years. This is a public format and I wanted to give jendeis advice from a medical perspective. I am sorry that you take offense, but it is hard for a medical professional to watch a young women who lacks basic understanding of human anatomy. Being overweight is not healthy. Being obese as Jendeis is can lead to tremendous future health risks. She states she is over 300lbs! I do not advocate a drastic change in her regimen while pregnant, but a food jounal and an increae in moderate activity is key. I truly hope jendeis can learn to be proactive and not simply blog about her problems...

Tabby said...

I agree with Aurora. Being fat sucks!! I lost 40lbs on Jenny Craig and my husband can't keep his hands to himself! Jendeis, sweetie loose the weight!!!! Your husband will be soo happy:) Maybe it will fix his "ptoblem."

Jo said...

Oh my God, who ARE these people? How DARE they judge you, whom they only know via your blog? Any credible medical professional would NOT be giving medical advice to someone simply based on a statement they made online.

This is NOT a public forum, people, but a PERSONAL BLOG written by a sensitive, caring, supportive, and wonderful woman. I cannot believe some of the comments being made to her (anonymous and otherwise) from people who don't know her one bit.

Finally, it is clear that these people have NO IDEA what Jendeis's marriage problems are, or anything at all about JD. To suggest that losing weight is going to fix HIS mental issues is simply ridiculous!

Jendeis, please, please, please do NOT listen to these assholes. You are a FABULOUS person and will be a FABULOUS mother at any size. If anything, you will be able to teach your child to LOVE himself/herself and not to base his or her self worth on something as insubstantial as a number on the scale.

I am just enraged and disgusted. Sending you big hugs -- and a bitch-slap or two for a few of your commenters.

Jo

Leah said...

Wow. There's no way I can pretend to know the nuances and complexities of the issues between you and JD, but I'm reasonably (read: entirely) sure that they have nothing to do with your weight and/or his level of attraction to you. Perhaps these people haven't read your blog for the past 2 years and aren't aware of the Aspergers, the chronic unemployment, the copious amounts of therapy, the mysterious foot issues, etc. Heavy sigh.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, it would be great if you could magically lose weight. Whatever. What you need is support and sympathy for the road you are traveling right now. A zofran pump is enough of a giant kick in the ass, along with the IF and the depression and the miscarriage and emotional quagmire of donor issues. Good grief, these people (medical professionals, anon commenters, and named commenters) need to cut you some slack. Whether they feel it's "in your best interest" to lose some weight or not, now is not the time to hop up on that soapbox.

Therefore, I offer no advice. Well, except this: do whatever it takes to bring this baby into the world and not lose your mind in the process.

xoxo

James said...

Hi Ladies,

I think I may be the only guy in this forum but from my perspective this Jendeis chick's biggest problem isn't her weight. She is on drugs? Hates her husband? Having a baby with a sperm donor? In addition, she is a huge fatty. I am not saying JD is right to be out of work, but give the guy a break!! JD if you are reading this RUN don't walk. Life is too short for a shitty marriage!

Karin said...

I am afraid to say I agree with the other commentators. I have been reading this blog for the last 2 years in horror, afraid to state my opinion. Poor JD...Jendeis treats him like crap. Doesn't she work for her father's business? I hope he is not with her just for the money. No other man would stay in this loveless marriage. I hope she can learn better manners.

Caroline said...

I happen to know Jendeis's mother. On a personal note, she can be VERY difficult to deal with. Any advice offered, she will not take. To those trying to help her, save your words. She needs to fall hard to see what a wonderful life she truly has. She writes for an audience, but as that I have a different perspective from most of you, her comments are HUGELY exaggerated at best.

Lucas said...

Is everyone in this blog fat? I saw 300lbs somewhere..Jambalaya! Just taking a poll. Don't hate

Commentator "Sassy cupcakes" is a cute name. Do you like cupcakes or look like one?

Me said...

I clicked to leave a comment to tell you that I had to disable anonymous comments from my blog too... and then I read all of these. Wow. I'm so appalled. As someone who has dealt with a spouse that was chronically ill and then chronically unemployed - how can these people say that YOU are being too hard on JD? It must be pick on Jendis day or something? I'm sorry for all the mean comments. I know from experience that they really do hurt. ((HUGS))

Dre said...

Oh my. I may be not up on blog etiquette, but holy shit. Where do people get off making such awful statements? And I do love those supposed IRL folks chiming in. Wow, with friends and family like that, I feel really bad for you.

Look, as a very fat momma myself, yes, I want to lose weight so I can chase my kids around without feeling like I am gonna collapse. Yes, it would be healthy for me to be thinner. But every single one of my doctors told me NOT to diet or try to lose weight during pregnancy or while I was nursing. You need to focus on your health and the baby's health right now, and worry about your weight later. One thing at a time.

Ignore these folks that seriously must have issues of their own to be so awful to someone they don't know on the internet.

sonja said...

All I have to say about that is a big WTF. I'm glad you turned off anonymous commenters -- if they can't behave then they should go elsewhere.

Photogrl said...

Why do people feel it's okay to continue to put someone down to feel better about themselves!?!

I love how everyone is talking about her weight, yet she's on a ZOFRAN pump because she can't keep anything down! It's not like she's kicking up her feet and just eating all day long! Ugh.

Hang in there, Jendeis...

Amanda said...

Holy shit what's up with the haters here? Who are you to judge? or to throw a degree around and say that means you know something about this situation? or to say you know someone's mother and think what she says is the freaking gospel?

JD, your true supporters are still here for you. Do what you have to do to bring your little one safely into the world and to hell with the rest of them!

JJ said...

Down with stupid ass trolls and cowards for leaving anon comments. You are doing an AMAZING job--dealing with feeling sick, JD's struggles, and Im proud of you for being brave to put all of this out there for complete strangers to read. WE love you!

Kate said...

Hiding your profile is just as cowardly as posting as anonymous. Ok, it's not healthy to be overweight. That's not breaking news, so save the advice, asshats. If you don't like someone's blog, don't read it. If you don't have anything but judgment and ridicule, shut the fuck up.

Delenn said...

Haven't read the offender comments (I'm at work) I can guess at the insensitivity, etc.

Being an overweight individual, having had 2 pregnancies as one...I can totally sympathize with your post!

I had one OB that I just hated because she would scornfully look at me (you know the way).

And you know what--everything was fine, I am fine (and losing weight as best I can).

So...FuCK 'em! And Fuck anonymous!

Melissa G said...

Holy Crap, those comments were ridonkulous.

People are absurd.


"Fine! Judge all you want to but; married a lesbian, left a man at the altar, fell in love with a gay ice dancer, threw a girl’s wooden leg in a fire, livin’ in a box!!!"

Hugs.

Courtney said...

First off Jendeis, you are an amazing woman & mommy. You keep your focus on what's important & the rest of us will back u 100%.

Secondly, to Dr-I'm-so-educated-that-I-think-it's-ok-to-degrade-a-pg-chick....back off, along with all u other know it alls. You might be a dr (might being the operative word), but even *I*, as a Paramedic, know that your advice is bogus. A pg woman should not be focusing on weight loss. As Photogrl mentioned, she's on Zofran...as a dr I would think you'd know that would indicate an issue with keeping food ordrink down. Thus meaning she's not over-eating NOR does she prob have the energy to be more active than usual. If she feels the need to diet post-baby, that's her business. Not Yours.

Her hubby has issues, & she has been the most supportive wife possible. So no, her losing weight while pg would not make him desire her any more.

James, shut it. Troll.

& the one who "knows her mom"....yeah, butt out.

If you can't show support, no one wants you here. She's not asking for advice (read:assvice), she just updating her own personal BLOG not FORUM.

Sheesh, I'm so annoyed at the dr. No clue at all as to the medical part of being preggo. Maybe that's why she's in family practice, not an obgyn or specialist.

(((hugs))) Jendeis, we love u! Xoxo

~Hollie said...

Seriously, I don't even know where to begin or end. But I do want to say hang in there. Put you and your child first. That is all that matters now.

Lollipop Goldstein said...

I love you, Jen. All other words are beside the point.

Rachael said...

Wow, I am new to the blog but I can't believe the static you are getting from complete strangers. The only opinions and advice you need should come from your own OB-and she doesn't seem nearly as "concerned" (opinionated) as most of the rude people commenting. I was over 200 lbs before getting pg with both of my pregnancies, reached 260 with the first and 275 with the second-and we all survived just fine.
I hope you don't take any of the criticism to heart.

O and I love the fact that you put the Shakespeare in the "Fun" category!

manapan said...

I was just following a link about hateful anon commentors... I'm so sorry you have to put up with all this bullshit!

Good luck with the rest of your pregnancy and (((hugs))) from your newest follower.

WindDrop said...

YAY for no anonymous comments!
First off, people shouldn't post hatefull comments. Usually you read someone's blog because you can relate or find them interesting, not to hate blog...jack.as.ses!

Like all overweight/obese people DON'T know that we should lose weight...DUH!

**HUGS***
But being overweight/obese my whole life doesn't make me a bad person, nor does it take away my desire to have children.
Should you (anonymous) not have children because you are stupid/ignorant/mean? Well, maybe. But who are we to decide who can and can't have children.

Anonymous should be more concerned about the homeless drug addict whore having children than us.

kim said...

There is a difference in being concerned for something that might be higher risk and being rude and insensitive. As if that should even need to be said. Some doctors need to take a "bedside manner" class in addition to medical school. Sheesh!

Dora said...

Who let the trolls out from under the bridge and gave them internet access? Jen, please go wash off that troll attracting perfume. Sorry you have to deal with this fuckwittery.

Yo, trolls (including the "dr")! Just. Go. Away.

areyoukiddingme said...

Clearly some of your commentors did not read the title to your blog. They really ought to take their crazy somewhere else...

And seriously, Aurora the family care physician, I hope you don't actually practice medicine. To counsel someone who has to be on a zofran pump about eating properly is the height of absurdity. I'm pretty sure Jendeis is spending ALL of her time searching for food that will stay down.

Finally, Jendeis, I hope you get better u/s techs next time around, and your doctor sounds like a reasonable individual. Hold on tight to that one!

K said...

WOW I am shocked. I am even more shocked that the idiot was able to get her head out of her ass long enough to comment. ((hugs)) I am a fat infertile who is preggo now and my docs never had a problem. Some folks really just need to get over themselves. I am glad your doc was able to smooth things over for you.

chicklet said...

The only mean comments I've ever gotten are mean ones too - it seems the mean people have real balls you know... commenting anonymously like that...

Anyway, I'm a retard who hasn't been reading much lately but am so happy to return to read you're pregnant and the baby is doing great:-)

.Thothythra said...

Most family practice docs are family practice docs because they weren't smart enough to get a good match.

The family practice docs who are family practice docs because they wanted to be and not because they had to be would never write on someone's blog the equivalent of, "You're fat. You must be too stoopid to know anything about health. Stop being fat."

Aurora is either a poseur troll or a physician of mediocre intelligence with poor social skills.