Monday, January 12, 2009

Belly Up to the Bar

Those who know me in IRL are often in situations where I am the victim of my inner ear's complete inability to maintain balance (i.e., I get motion sick. And nauseated. A lot. A lotta lot).

Apparently, my body has chosen to view the sites of my fair city by vomiting at all the major (and some not-so-major) tourist attractions. See (non-inclusive list) Airport, Dulles International; Airport, Washington National; Capitol Building, House Side; Capitol Building, Rotunda; National Archives; National Gallery of Art, East Building; National Gallery of Art, West Building; Rayburn House Office Building; University, George Washington; University, Georgetown; Verizon Center; Washington Monument, The; White House, The. Well, today we can add the United States Supreme Court to the list.

BFF got sworn in to the Supreme Court bar today (presumably to litigate my appeals when I finally kill someone). In order for this to happen, bar applicants (and their guests) must show up at the court between oh dark thirty and WTF-o'clock. So, the still dark and really freakin' cold morning found me putting on my suit, taking the Metro (where I saw a guy I went to law school with who completely did not see me) to BFF's stop, walking over to her apartment, taking a cab to the court, finding the attorney's entrance (yes, we're special), going through security, sitting around, then throwing up in the marble-tiled and quite echoey bathroom. Tried to hold it in for the oral arguments (I coulda been on the news!), but couldn't make it.

I wound up calling John Dear just before we had to file into the courtroom so that he could pick me up. There was no way I'd be able to last on Metro. ONE HOUR IN THE 29 DEGREE COLD LATER, I walk 6 blocks to the train station for him to pick me up. Have I mentioned that JD is completely unable to handle directions, traffic and geography?

To sum up: I'm incredibly proud of BFF, I'm getting JD a GPS for his car, and no, I don't have frostbite.

Please excuse my utter inarticulateness tonight. Will do better tomorrow.

9 comments:

nancy said...

(I haven't read this post yet, but YOU WON the birth guessing game! Yay! I get to get a gift for not only someone I "know", but someone I like!!)

theclam said...

Jen, that must be really hard to deal with. I hate being sick so cannot think of anything worse - oh wait I can - being the only dumbbulb with no baby in my circle of real life friends.

Glad you got picked up (albeit off track) and have no frostbite!

HUGS
xxx

~Jess said...

How crappy! At least you didn't have to sit there in misery and you didn't get frostbite: I hope you're feeling better.

Congrats to your friend!

~Jess said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
~Jess said...

I accidentally posted twice, tuhis the delete

uncomplicateme said...

j has a horrible sense of direction, and mine is really good (just a weird perk ...) so we are constantly at odds when travelling. Thankfully the GPS has worked wonders and he now doesn't have to call me when he's travelling for work and stuck at the on interstate 384 in podunkville america where he just drove by exit 394A and a McDonald's, and wants me to google map it to find where he needs to go. He's lucky I love him. :)

annacyclopedia said...

You are a barfing champion, Jendeis. There is no other thing to say other than you should be in the Guiness Book of World Records!

And I know it's all relative in terms of the weather and what we're used to and stuff, but I'm having difficulty mustering sympathy for your 29 degrees. I'd give my eye teeth for 29 degrees right about now. On the other hand, I suppose you weren't wearing long underwear, jeans, 3 shirts, a toque, scarf, gloves, a down parka with a hood, and Sorels (best winter boots known to humanity). So I guess I do have some sympathy for you on the weather thing after all.

Hillary said...

Whoa, that is some horrible thing your body does to you....I HATE barfing. I'm so sorry!! Your post did make me chuckle despite having to think about vomiting in all those places...that's a lot of sickness...

Tricia said...

Oh no! That is just awful. Just look at the bright side. At least you didn't throw up on the news!