Still Here

Life and work have been kicking my butt this week. In the interests of efficiency, I bring to you -- the bulleted list!

• Unless you live under a rock, you may have heard that the U.S. housing market is experiencing some troubles. I work in housing -- we're experiencing some troubles.
• Flew up to Boston on Sunday and gave a lecture on the condo craze on Monday morning at my alma mater. What a rush! Very cool, and it allowed me to see my college for the first time since graduation, May 1999. Plus, the professor and some other university folks took me to lunch at the Faculty Club where students aren't allowed to eat. My feeling of awesome status was only heightened by having the university president come up to meet me. So cool.
• Went to the mikveh for the second time and experienced the same feeling of bliss and peace that I had after my first time. It's kind of like being coated in peace, love and hope.
• Cooked dinner a few times and experienced good home-cooked meals. Yay for Dream Dinners!
• Went to a wine tasting at my building last night and got to cross off one of my 101/1001 items. The wine tasting wasn't really well done, kind of chaotic. I'd like to go to one that is more geared to education.
• BFF was offered a job up here and after thinking she wouldn't be able to take the job because of economic concerns, they called back and offered her more - enough for her to take the job! Yay for BFF!
• Blogger has spell check up and running again. Yay for Blogger!

F this S

My housekeeper just got here and asked me if we were having a bebe yet. "Because jou've been marry a long time - 1, 2 jears? Gotta have that bebe soon. Next jear maybe?"

O M G!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This Says It All

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Still sick, but definitely better than previous days. Weather is yucky outside, but John Dear is making sure that we are well stocked with all the necessities.

Necessities

• Milk
• Bread
• American cheese
• Chicken soup
• Gatorade
• Coke
• Lo Mein

Our housekeeper who usually comes on Friday mornings, has yet to arrive. I'm worried that she's stuck in the storm, but hope that she's home safe. I must get better if only so that we can have clean spoons for tea. And soup. And the Coke (because you have to stir out all the bubbles when you are using it as a nausea-fix). Thankfully, we have clean forks for the Lo Mein.

Sick

Welcome to the Vomitorium. Spent all of Tuesday night with my head in a trash can -- couldn't make it to the bathroom. Well, that stopped yesterday morning after I got a couple doses of Emetrol in me (greatest invention known to humankind, did you know that?).

I missed my HSG (scheduled for this morning) and a business trip that I had been looking forward to.

I tried to take a shower this morning, but the water wouldn't come on. What's up with that? Didn't want to use the other bathroom since I'm trying to keep that germ-free for John Dear who will likely get sick anyways since he was up to his elbows in my throwup and The Boy's pee/poop/puke. BTW, The Boy is not sick, these incidents were merely a result of JD forgetting to take him out for his walk and JD feeding The Boy creamy ravioli. Guess what? Dogs don't do well on creamy, greasy food.

I want a grilled cheese sandwich and matzah ball soup. There is nothing good on TV. Going to get another hit of Gatorade now. Also, in case you've gotten this far, do you know why Spell Check no longer works on Blogger? Would like to blog more, but my head is spinning from sitting up for so long.

Read All About It

Well, maybe not all, but this is a good beginning. Finally, a real live newspaper article about male-factor infertility. Read it here in today's Washington Post.

WARNING: The following can be considered a self-centered vent. Read on if you dare.

Not that I begrudge anyone from focusing on female-factor infertility. Far from it. Just that it's nice to read stuff that applies to what you are going through. Even so, I've yet to see a truly comprehensive article or blog dealing with our particular problem so far.* In fact, it just took me a full 15 minutes to find that not-so helpful Wikipedia article.

Additionally, we haven't found a resource (doctor or otherwise) who is able to give us concrete steps on what to do to resolve the situation, beyond the untenable solution of John Dear going off his meds.

*Not that I want us to have another problem, just that I don't know if that is our only barrier to conception.

Your Vote Needed

Please take a moment to watch Robert Stillman's short film, Stars, made for his wife after the birth of their son, who was stillborn at 8 months. If you watch it before tomorrow, please rate it and add it to your favorites for inclusion in the Rumschpringe very short film contest. Remember a kleenex - beautiful movie!

Efficiency Rules

Had my CD 3 monitoring this morning and passed with flying colors! Nurse reports that I'm normal (all evidence to the contrary). Being the efficient person that I am, I scheduled my HSG* for Thursday morning, so I will go to that, then fly down to ATL that afternoon to do a site visit on one of my company's properties {helping to make progress on one of my 101/1001 tasks [look to your left, (also, look to your left)]}.

NB: For those needing help on any abbreviations, please see Mel's wonderful list of explanations or email me. ATL = Atlanta, GA (that abbreviation probably won't show up on Mel's list).

*HSG (hysterosalpingogram) - to paraphrase my doctor, we're gonna shoot some dye up your hoo-hoo, then take x-rays to watch the dye splash out. If the dye doesn't splash out, there's something wrong with your hoo-hoo. For an actual explanation, see here.

Can You Handle the Truth?

So, here's the truth among the lies:
1. My alias is a play on words of my maiden name. Nope, it's a play on my college, created in a fit of school spirit after I graduated.

2. I was so bloodthirsty in watching John Dear play God of War that I actually scared him. All too true, I believe at one point I asked, "why aren't they raping the women?"

3. My cell phone number is one digit off from a federally-indicted drug trafficker and I get lots of late night phone calls from his "clients". Not true (so far as I know), but the jury is still out.

4. I secretly think that Virginia is better than Maryland. Never, never, never. I'm a Marylander forever.

5. I knew where the name Gatorade came from before the commercials. True! I also know where the phrase "hocus pocus" comes from. (Email me if you want the details).

6. My mother and I are no longer allowed to play Scrabble together because we scream at each other so much that a neighbor once called the cops on us. Sorry, no. We do, however, voluntarily refrain from playing this fight-inciting game because my mother is a cheater.

7. I am a nationally-ranked player of Trivial Pursuit and was once requested to audition for Jeopardy. Come on, people. National rankings for Trivial Pursuit? I will, however, take on any and all comers.

8. I taught a class to my company's employees on the required paperwork for reporting suspected terrorist cells in our apartments. Nope, the class was on reporting sex offenders and avoiding bedbugs.

Tell Me Lies, Tell Me Sweet Little Lies

Yes, I'm weak and cave in to peer pressure. Sue me. Before you do, however, please take a guess at the two truths in the following list.

1. My alias is a play on words of my maiden name.
2. I was so bloodthirsty in watching John Dear play God of War that I actually scared him.
3. My cell phone number is one digit off from a federally-indicted drug trafficker and I get lots of late night phone calls from his "clients".
4. I secretly think that Virginia is better than Maryland.
5. I knew where the name Gatorade came from before the commercials.
6. My mother and I are no longer allowed to play Scrabble together because we scream at each other so much that a neighbor once called the cops on us.
7. I am a nationally-ranked player of Trivial Pursuit and was once requested to audition for Jeopardy.
8. I taught a class to my company's employees on the required paperwork for reporting suspected terrorist cells in our apartments.

Nothing to See Here

My blood test yesterday indicates that I ovulated recently and am not pregnant. Apparently, my cycle just happened to be really, really long. My nurse (hereinfter referred to as "Nurse") discussed with me various reasons for the long length, e.g., illness, travel, stress, all of which I've experienced recently so it made sense.

Nurse stressed that the thing to take away from all this is that I ovulated without medication and will likely get my period in the next week or so without medical intervention. Umm, see that was never my problem, and I told Nurse that. Nurse said that every bit of information helps, and it rules out any problems that even we weren't aware of. Big W to that.

As I always look on the bright side of life, the good news about not being pregnant is that I am free to get my hair colored as it is not looking its best, and I can drink coffee without feeling guilty that I am permanently ruining my child. :)

Well, Who Knows?

AF did not visit over the weekend, so I went to this morning's monitoring appointment hoping for answers. The nurse took blood and then I had my very first experience with the dildo-cam.

The ultrasound tech was very nice, though I was a bit weirded out that she was very, very pregnant. Um, is it supposed to be some kind of a motivational thing? She wasn't "in your face" about it, never even mentioned it, I just happened to look at her scrubs and there was her bellay. Hmm.

The doc came in (very nice and looks totally like Stanford Blatch from Sex & the City) and they conferred and told me that my left ovary has a cyst but is nothing to worry about. Probably just from a burst egg. The right ovary has lots of pre-follicles. Is that their right or my right? Should've asked that.

They did not see a gestational sac, but said that it could just be early, so no definitive answers yet. Waiting for my call back to see what my hormone levels are and what the doc wants to do.

Thanks for all your support on plans and exercising! I've exercised at least 30 minutes every day since Thursday! Go me!

Woman with a Plan, G-D laughs

I called the nurse at Giant Fertility Clinic this morning and told her my story, sad but true. She remarked that it was very unusual for me, but that it was possible that I might not have ovulated or might have ovulated late. She scheduled me for a blood test and perhaps an ultrasound on Monday to see what's going on. If I see AF this weekend, I just cancel.

Also told my nurse (who then related the tale to my doctor) about Dr. Az-hat. They both apologized, but stressed the need for John Dear to get a full workup and SA. Doc suggested a new urologist, assuring me that this one was very nice and would not be an az-hat. I hope so.
___________________
I took a journey on the treadmill last night for 30 minutes, in addition to taking The Boy for a long walk. I'm going to make this longer walking path our regular path from now on. I was worried that going on the treadmill so late in the day would keep me awake, but there were no problems there. (My only problem was the book that I'm currently listening to and the fact that I was listening about torture procedures in the 1950s while trying to fall asleep. Apparently, not the greatest idea I've ever had).

I've been bringing my sneakers to work with me all this week, but as yet have not gone walking. I plan to do so today; that way, I won't have to go on the treadmill tonight.

What's Goin' On?

Seriously, cause I have no idea right now. Negative sticks on Tuesday morning and Tuesday evening. But, I still haven't seen AF.

Didn't take any tests yesterday, nor this morning. No AF.

Dizziness and nausea ended on Tuesday morning to be replaced by mild cramps on Tuesday afternoon. AF, still a no show.

This morning, nausea returned. An hour ago, dizziness returned. AF could at least have let me know something by now. I'm available by phone or email. It's been a couple of days, she's actually being pretty rude.

Told John Dear that if AF hasn't shown up by tomorrow morning, that I will call my nurse at Giant Fertility Clinic and ask for a blood test.

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In related news, I now weigh 5 billion pounds. This puts my BMI to about 100.2. If AF does come and we need to do IUI, GFC has a weight limit, meaning that I'll have to drop some serious weight or figure out a way to grow 10 feet taller before they will go ahead. I just haven't found anything that's worked for me in my life right now. Apparently, just paying for a Weight Watchers' membership does not help you to lose weight. I wish someone had told me that. Sheesh.

WFMW - Favorite Online Stores

Welcome to Works-for-Me Wednesday, everyone! Today, Shannon has asked us to list our favorite online stores.

Gifts
Uncommon Goods - a wonderful, quirky store that has lots of different kinds of gifts. I've been buying from them for several years (after hearing about them in Lucky Magazine). Never had a problem and you get to donate part of the purchase price to a choice of charities.

Red Envelope - the gift store that has something for everyone. Red Envelope can be on the expensive side, but I've found that if you need a gift fast, they are really great about rushing shipment.

Makeup
Sephora - my first, my last, my everything. Three free samples with every purchase. 'Nuff said.

Shoes
Aerosoles - I have a very wide foot, so this is usually my first place when looking for shoes. It seems like they have a new special every other day. Very quick shipment and easy to return.

Nine West - Beautiful shoes and great search parameters. Sometimes on the expensive side, so I use this site more as a "look book" to see what's in fashion this season.

Plus-Size Clothes
Lane Bryant - my go-to store. I'm in love with their suits. Good deals on underthings too. Recently, they've been pumping up their selection with more exercise clothes, sweats and maternity clothes.

Nordstrom - an unusual choice, as most of their plus-size clothing was horrible in the past. I believe they have new buyers now, so the cool factor of their clothes has been improving. I've been getting some wonderful cocktail dresses and summer dresses here. Plus, a great selection of shoes.

Jessica London - found this site while surfing Amazon a couple years ago. Generally not my style, but every so often you hit a gold mine of what you are looking for.

Old Navy - great casual clothes, usually pretty cheap.

Land's End - my destination for winter coats and bathing suits.

That's a Big Fat No, Chief

Took a test this morning; it's negative. It may just be early, but I'm trying not to pin all my hopes on that fact (umm, it may be a bit late for that).

Told John Dear, who did not take it well. He wants to stay home from work, lie in bed all day and cry. He's also talking about how he's a child who plays video games all day and why be a man because he's a huge failure.

I don't think he's a failure. I just don't think that this will happen for us in the traditional way. If it does, great. But there was a plan in place before these last couple of days, and we'll stick with that.

Told him that if I don't have a "definite no" tonight, that I will go buy more tests (b/c this morning's test was my last one in stock). We'll see. This just stinks.

Pins & Needles

Um, um, um. Afraid if I say anything that I will be tempting fate. Afraid if I don't say anything that I will explode into a million pieces of anticipation. We've done this waiting dance before. Just one day more. Dear G-D, please let this work.

Bloggy Giveaway Winner!!

Thank you to all who participated in my bloggy giveaway this week. I use these giveaways as an opportunity to meet more people through their blogs; hopefully, you will do the same.

Thanks to Random.org for selecting the winner of the Fanch print. The winner is...

Robynl

YAY!!

So congratulations to Robynl and good luck to everyone in the other giveaways this week! Robynl, I will be contacting you via email (thank you for including it) to send you the print.