Thursday, June 18, 2009


First, thank you so much for your comments and caring. Your notes truly get me through my days and I turn back to them again and again.

I got a lot accomplished last night and this morning so I thought I'd write it down, not to brag, just to remember that I can accomplish lots when I try.

Last night I:
-Created a new "intention" - telling the baby "You can go if you need to go. You don't have to stay because I want you to stay. You can go if you need to go. I'm letting you go. I love you." Concentrated on my intention several times during the evening and before bed.
-Cleared the table after dinner
-Took out trash and recycling
-Rinsed all dishes and loaded the dishwasher
-"Fluffed" the clean load of laundry sitting in the dryer
-Loaded a load of towels and the Pesach tablecloth (only 2 months after Pesach) in the washer)
-Folded and put away the equivalent of 4 loads of laundry
-Made the bed
-Put my shoes in the closet
-Laid out workout clothes and work clothes for this morning
-Took down old, ripped shower curtain and bad shower curtain rings and hung up new shower curtain with new rings
-Deadheaded flowers
-Put plastic footstool that had been holding giant pile of laundry in bedroom onto the balcony to live with its matching chair
-Walked The Boy
-Washed my face
-Flossed and brushed teeth
-Went to sleep at 10 PM

This Morning I:
-Got up after only two snooze cycles
-Concentrated on my intention
-Took myself on a half hour walk in the rain (I am HARD CORE!) and blissed out to my C-SPAN podcast on Lincoln's time as a president-elect (I am HARD CORE DORK!)
-Took a nice shower
-Got dressed for work
-Made tea for me and JD and put his tea (covered) on his nightstand so it's ready for him when he wakes up
-Made a healthy breakfast for me of Greek yogurt, blueberries, banana and walnuts
-Ate my breakfast and drank my tea while reading a book
-Cleared off table, rinsed dishes, loaded them in dishwasher and started the dishwasher
-Remembered to bring SIL's Kale and Salmon Quiche with me for lunch
-Took The Boy to doggie daycare
-Put on makeup
-Took my pills (Zoloft and prenatal vitamins)

Now I'm at work. I'm hoping to finish comments on the monthly financials and "attend" several conference calls. On one of the calls, my boss is trying to surpass the world record in how many times he uses the F word on one call. Will let you know how that goes.


Jen said...

I miss the days of having lots of conference calls as I did in my last job. At least then I could mute the phone and surf the internet during boring meetings. Now I have to pretend to be interested and remember not to roll my eyes.

Hang in there hon.

N said...

I'm so impressed with how much you've done.

Your Intention is good. It's hard, and good. Much love.

PJ said...

You put me to shame!

calliope said...

thinking of you lots & lots

Jo said...

I cannot imagine how difficult it is to let go of something you want so much. I am so sorry, as you deserve so much better. Keeping busy seems to help me, too, when life gets too hectic to manage. Lists are nice, orderly reminders of what we can accomplish in a chaotic universe.


Jen said...

That is an amazing list of accomplishments. Good job.

I've been thinking of you.

LJ said...

That, my dear, is a beautifully selfless intention.

Anonymous said...

Your #1 broke my heart. ((HUGS))

BTW, do you want to move in and have tea waiting for me in the AM??? That rocks and you are so sweet!!!

How many F words were there?

Clare said...

I awarded you Honest Scrap for your honest and brave posts:

Anonymous said...

Weird, my boss my also be vying for the same title. Perhaps they're on the same call?

Thinking of you.

Anonymous said...

I am impressed with your "intention." It sounds heartbreakingly difficult. I'm so sorry about all of this. I wish I could put tea on YOUR nightstand. Someone needs to.

Miriam said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Smiling said...

Your intention really pierced my heart. I love it in its pure honesty, but damn what a hard one to say and believe. I hate that you are in a place where you have to think of such an intention.

much love from a fellow hard core rain walker.