Tuesday, June 30, 2009

At Zero

Went in for blood work today and beta hcg is down to zero. The blood work merely confirmed what I thought already, given that the bleeding had stopped by Saturday. We're cleared to start dIUI #2 as soon as I start my next cycle.

JD and I have been working to be happy, with ourselves and each other. Our joint therapy session on Sunday was somewhat traumatic for me. I felt that both therapists were ganging up on me, either blaming me for JD's behavior or saying that I was elevating it due to the grief from the miscarriage and the pregnancy hormones, OR somehow saying that I wasn't really grieving the miscarriage, like I wasn't showing the right emotions or something (a la Camus' L'Etranger (please excuse the lack of accents - I just don't feel like looking up the code)).

Going to see Jim Gaffigan tonight and I'm quite excited about it. I need to laugh.

17 comments:

Lorza said...

YEAH for comedy. I love it. I am going to see Ron White in August and I can't wait!!!

I am so sorry about the HCG. That just sucks. I hope that you have a great next cycle. I will be sending you lots of good thoughts. {{HUGS}}

L

PJ said...

Zero is a good thing. I mean, it's bad overall, but it's good for being able to start over.

calliope said...

oh honey. I continue to just be so so sorry for your loss. Will be thinking a million good thoughts for IUI #2.

& dude- Jim Gaffigan?!! LOVE! Hope you have a wonderful time.

Melissa G said...

I'm glad you're given the green light for your next cycle. Though I'm sorry Sunday was tough. Hopefully some clarity will come from it down the road, for everyone.

I'm so jealous! I LOVE Jim Gaffigan! Hawwwwt Pockettssss.

And Hugs!

Hillary said...

My fingers are crossed for IUI #2!

nancy said...

oh honey, i'm only now getting caught up. I'm so sorry what you had to go through and still going through. A bajillion ~hugs~.

Jo said...

Screw your therapists. What the hell do they know?

Keep treating yourself well.

Thinking of you.

Hugs,
Jo

Jill said...

Seriously? They told you that HIS behavior was YOUR fault? F them!

I'm glad you're able to start #2 right away, though. Thinking of you!

meinsideout said...

I too am glad you will be able to start a new cycle.

Jen said...

I'm sorry. I'm glad you get to start again soon though.

becomingwhole said...

I'm sorry that you had to deal with anything else on top of what you're already dealing with (fucking therapists).

On a different note, yay for zero, yay for comedy, yay for moving forward.

~Jess said...

I'm sorry you're even having to go through all of this *hugs*. I hate when people try to tell me what I'm feeling (or not feeling). Hopefully your next session is better.

Clare said...

Yikes your therapy session sounds not too good. It's meant to make you feel better right? I hope you get to start next IUI soon. Thinking of you. And thanks for the comment about the crepes. We're staying in Montmatre so I think I'll go scout around for it!

Me said...

((HUGS))

Io said...

I don't like these therapists so much.

Hope you got your laugh on!

Kymberli said...

Hey, sweetie. I just want you do know that I'm thinking of you always.


(and there's something that might brighten your day for you over on my blog)

I Believe in Miracles said...

I'm sorry to hear this!
~~HUGS~~